#1. Be careful! Don't be stupid and hurt yourself.

#2. Don't be a chicken!

#3. You have to use enough force to get through the skin and strike the shell.

#4. You have to hold the coconut in your hand (See #2).  If you put the coconut on the counter or somewhere else, it will most likely roll away, the cleaver will slip from your hands and fall on your foot and cause some sort of medical emergency. (See #1).

#5. You don't have to draw it, but map out a square with lines halfway between the pointy part of the coconut to the outer circle.

#6. Chop away!  Make ONE, clean, solid, chop for each side of your square.  You have to hold the coconut in your hand or you won't get good strikes. If you have two left hands, then you should just give up right now. Don't blame me!  Use enough force to get through the skin and strike the shell.  If you don't, a couple of things will happen: 1. you won't be able to peel off the skin and 2. the shell won't crack open.

Tip: Don't be afraid! You're not the hulk; It's not like you're going to cut straight through the coconut and lop off your hand!  And uhh... just be sure to aim right. Good luck!

#7.  With good, solid chops you'll have cut out a square from the top of the coconut.

#8. Drop in a bendy straw and a teaspoon and you're done! Sip out the milk and use the spoon to dig out the tender meat.

Here's a video:

Credits: Thanks Ying for filming the video! And thanks for not laughing TOO hard and shaking the camera :P

老娘註:老爺"盧"我幫他錄影開椰子把戲已經很久了.今天終於完成他的心願.你們看的時候會覺得鏡頭有點晃,是的,我忍的很辛苦,因為真的很想笑.而且在錄影之前,他特地交代我說,如果他開的時候不小心切到砍到自己流血了,千萬不可以中途暫停,一定要繼續錄下去,因為這樣才是搞笑的最高境界.呼!還好過程順利,要真的切到流血,我這個攝影師還不知道怎麼反應咧....

再看一次錄影之後,我突然驚覺老爺好像有天份可以在大賣場賣那種很好用的拖把抹布清潔用品之類.

Also, see part 2 where the camerawoman poses with the coconut.